one last.......

It was an after rain….the rustic grandpa trees…swampy grass…birds hugging each other…enjoying the romance, the nature gifted them..…hiding from drizzling cold shower in their partner's wings…enjoying the first drops….in that hot summer eve….

She could almost hear the tiny chirps of her eggs…..it was about to hatch…The rain made a nice soft bed of her nest.The eggs hatched…It’s a chubby boy and a cute girl…a rain drop, fell on their tiny heads, from the leaf above…giving a quick shower to our twins…She gave both of her pebbles a tight warm hug…Then flew off to fetch some snacks for their brand new, tiny hungry tummies…..

.........…...

The Bubble Elementary School, not that far from the rain forest….The kids there could almost hear the chirping cries of the new twins in the woods…It seems the rain couldn’t reach the school…it’s still so hot…and silent.

Silence, is not the kind of adjective that should ever be used with School…It’s scary….

Could see masked men...two masks,running along the school corridors…These corridors are supposed to be echoing with laughs and sounds of running footsteps of small sneakers at this time…but now, it was empty except for a shoe left out alone, without its pair, few dots of red here and there…A five year old leg, was left hanging out of the bathroom door….Still…Dead…..

It was the III grade class room….There were four hearts beating really fast in that closed walls…That of the two masked men, wounded and two kids…twins…hostages….

She, their mother was standing outside the class room door, with few of the staffs and a few policemen….helpless.

Sweat…blood…tear, she was all washed out with these….She shouted…requesting for her sons.She pressed hard against the class room walls…but there wasn’t any answer…

After some time,what seemed like hours…they heard gun firing from the room…she went crying, running into the room….The door slammed closed behind her…and she was pushed to the to the floor from behind…She turned back to see her sons, all tied up but, alive…She got up from the floor, to reach them, but was hit back on to the floor by one of the masked man….

She noticed other one was lying on the other corner of the room, in a blood pool…dead…The masked man started firing out of the window, to the direction of forest…shrieking in agony…frustrated…and he took away the masking turban….

Long hair jumped out onto his scarred face….It was… a Woman…

She looked back at the mother….her eyes…blood red…raging in anger…She walked slowly towards the blood pool…Unmasked the other...it was a man…and gave a kiss on his forehead…and closed his dead eyes….

She then pointed the gun straight at the mother’s face and started saying something….She was trying to speak in english...

”you...America…..kill…my daughters…clothes…raped….I…kill all” ..She started firing at the forest again…out through the window…..

.........…...

One of her hot bullets hit on the barks of the dried up trees on the hill side….a spark…and a fire…a wild wire was broke open…left loose…

The hungry fire devoured half the area in a few seconds…The sound of the gun shot and sudden deadly warmth called the mother bird back to her twins…..Her eyes was all yellow and orange…the reflection of the wildfire that almost neared her first hatchlings…She hugged the crying twins tight...into her tiny wings….The fire has now started tasting her tree…her home…Her heart was cracking along with the creaking sound of the trunk breaking into halves….She clutched the wingless twins, one in each of her claws….She dropped them many times back into the nest….Finally, she got a vague grip and flew off, from her falling home… into the half eaten…burning forest…all yellow in fire…all around….

With all the smoke she couldn’t see anything….She continued flying…struggling hard to stay in air…grip slipping at every turn….The twins were getting heavy in her clutches…She couldn’t hold both of them in a tight grip…her claws started slipping…but there wasn’t any tree left were she could place one of them for a while….she was flying over sea of fire that’s reaching out it’s claws to catch her twins…

It’s too hard for her to hold both of ‘em and fly to safety….

It’s done…it’s over…….she need to take a dirty choice now….

.........…...

The lady pointed the gun at the twins…Mother cried for mercy…The lady seemed to be enjoying every drop of her useless weeps…She removed her overcoat…and revealed that she was all wired up…

After a long gap of silence…..the lady pushed the boys a bit closer to their crying mother…She wiped off her tears and came near her sons to pick them up…The lady with gun sensed her motion stood up in a swift motion and pointed the gun back at the tied up kids...

Their mother stood dead still….

The lady spoke….”pick….one…….”

She couldn’t believe her ears…

Mother asked “WHAT???...”

“Pick…..Choose one….” And then she showed the timer….00:00:59

“1 min….pick one and go….out….”

00:00:50

She looked in the blue...watery…eyes of her 5 year old sons….

“I’ve to pick one among them…? My sons? My only sons???” the question echoed in the walls of her aching heart....

00:00:45

“No time……fast…choose one or leave...”

00:00:44

All the sweet memories…Their first smile….first walk….all those peek-a-boos…first day cry at school…All flashed back like it happened just yesterday and now, has to make a decision that would leave one half of these moments, just a memory that would be so painful to cherish……

00:00:43

“PICK…………”

.........…...

Fire was getting taller and higher…and she was almost down for a crash land….

Both of them were too heavy for her to fly high….She has to drop one of them...to save the other….But the very thought tore her heart apart….it was burning hot…hotter than the forest…But she has to……

She made up her mind to do it, at the next turn…She didn’t look back at the tiny cries at her claws….The next turn was just a second apart. She took the turn…closed tight her eyes…and opened up one of her claws…she didn’t even know which one….and with the less weight of her only DAUGHTER…she flew higher…and higher…out of the forest…out of the smoke…and out of the wretched fire that made her kill, her son..

.........…...

00:00:35

“NOW……”

00:00:33

“I…I can’t…..”

00:00:30

“NOWWW”

00:00:24

Mother stood up and ran towards the lady grabbed the nearest tiny hand …turned and gave a final helpless look at the other son…tied up at the gun point..

“RUN…RUN….”

She hugged tight to her son…and ran out through the fire exit…The policemen and the rest followed her ,out of the school…….

00:00:00

One such day.....

It was about 11 at night…dad was busy revising his news paper…probably for the 12’th time…all the news was so stale…so cold by now…still he was so into it, like it was his life’s mission.

Maa was busy playing with the remote….popping in questions occasionally to the newsaholic…who would “hmm” her away…
i went near the shelf to look something. It was the photo from my bro’s marriage…it had all five of us…I really miss him…
All my life I was compared to this guy…”learn at least something from your brother…”
“Why are you hurting us like this….your brother has never disgraced us” …dad always used to tell…shout rather.

But my brother…never let me down…he always comes up with that beautiful comforting curve in his lips…and with some good reason for all my misdeeds. No wonder everyone likes him…If I have a son someday…I wish the boy to be like my brother…no headaches…lifetime happiness guaranteed….

I wiped the dust off the frame, and kept it back on the shelf…I kissed my mom a good night…and went to bed….I don’t speak to dad…not even good nights. We lost connection far before…I’m not sure if he remembers I exist….

I went to bed…it takes a lot of time for me to sleep, no matter how tired I’m….I’ve to force myself to it….All these sweet memories…well, I’m not sure if it had happened before…may be I’m imagining it ,I get these flash backs from some unwritten chapters from my past...every night before I sleep…
. . .

There’s this little me…my tiny fingers clutched tight in the hands of my dad…we are taking a walk on this road, it was dusk, I don’t know which road, with tall trees on both sides...u know the one like the Autumn wallpaper that comes with windows XP…He was doing all these childish things with me…walking me on his toes…playing airplane…and we talk for long hours….he makes me smile and surprise me with magic tricks…


I don’t know how i cooked up these thoughts…but I cherish them like some good old memories…of my life

I fell asleep…
. . .

I woke up....took a wide stretch. And a long yawn….came out of my room…Maa was leaning on to the dining table as usual, I said something like a good morning to her…

Just when she heard me, she stopped reading...I turned back to face her…she raised her head from the table…she seemed to be scared for some reason to hear my voice…I was glued to the floor at her reaction…She turned her face slowly towards me...and when she saw me, she started screaming…loud shrieks…calling dad for help…I went near her…tried to calm her down...she started to step away from me…slapping my hand off...
”Maa it’s me…it’s me..” I kept on repeating that…I didn’t even think of a day, tat I would have to say ‘this’ to my maa.

Dad came running down the stairs…he started shouting at me “WHO ARE YOU…”
“Lakshmi, WHY DID YOU OPEN DOOR FOR A STRANGER FROM THE STREET”…

Stranger ??? I didn’t understand….He came running to me…he caught me by my sleeves and pushed me hard to the shelf…I fell on to our photo…I grabbed it and showed it to them...but he still came closer...I just looked at the photo...And I couldn’t believe my eyes….I’m missing in that frame…
Dad grabbed back the photo and pushed me to door….I hit my head on the wall...but that pain was nothing….He slammed hard the front door at my face….

. . .

I woke up…it was a dream??? I was all sweaty….and panting like some mad dog just chased me .…my head ached, where it hit on the wall…it seemed so real...but why….It felt like De javu rather a dream…
I went to my bedroom door…everything felt lil different….I opened it…I saw maa…reading the news paper…I don’t know why it looked so scary. I forced a good morning out of me…it was hardly audible…she ‘hmm’ed…

OH… MAAAN, that was the most beautiful relieving “hmm” of my life….
As I was walking away I saw Maa turning towards me…and I stopped …she turned and asked...

”Who are you????”

the brighter side

Hi, beautiful morning today…so warm…smells good too. Sorry, forgot to introduce me, I’m Jess, i’m 18….I love music…listens to all kind...all day….Solo instrumentals, especially cello, brings butterflies in my stomach….absolutely adore them…

Met a girl last weekend…feb 2^nd…Rosaline...i went to the super market with my doggy boy Dan…...I fell for her instantly…quite literally…I tipped over the door step of the supermarket, and fell on her…She picked up her books or something. and held me by my arms and helped me up to get up…Her touch…so soft…so gentle..i could feel…hear…slow.. Für Elise echoing in the super market…She then came so close to my face…I could feel the warmth of her breath…She asked if I’m fine…voice...sweet as the bird that sings me to sleep every nite….far from my bedroom window….God must be a male…for sure.

We had a coffee together…and she kept on singing for me…..i was so melted in her voice…I don’t remember a word she said…don’t know if it was even English.. Usually I’m the one who never stops talking…

This one time….I was talking to a guy, Smith, at the mall…he was just listening to me…gave a “hmm” occasionally…anyway, I went on…After a while, Joe came to me and asked who am I talking to. Then I noticed Smith wasn’t there, he went far before…I was so embarrassed …then I heard this bunch of guys laughin at the nearby corner..It was Smith and his friends…I started laughing with them…Think of a guy sitting in the middle of a Mall and talking to himself….omg…I laughed all day…Funny guy Smith…Though Joe was a bit angry at him...but he calmed down fast…

Well, I’ll come back to Rosaline…She was still talking…and I enjoyed the music she’s conducting. Having no idea of the lyrics or which song even. Then she said something that brought me back to my self…”I’m leaving for Paris tomorrow” she said…I came to know that she lives there, with her friend…I smiled and kissed her hand...a good bye…

I came home….my night bird didn’t sing my lullaby that night or any night there after…busy in Paris I guess… ;)

Joe and I went for the sunset…we go there almost all evenings…I like the walk in the sand…bare foot…I like the warmth of the last few rays of the sun…it’s like the parting hands scene of an old Shakespeare play…a romantic. sad good bye to this side of earth… I like listening to children quarreling at each other for ruining their sand castles…Even, Eiffel wont be this sad and violent if his tower went down…I always join in the quarrel….and I would end up in a sand coffin these tiny evils bury me in...Joe has to drag me home every time, I don’t like leaving the beach….

Maa bought me sweater…for my b’day…a Black one…my favorite color…We had this party…I cut the cake, maa made….and gave the piece to maa…she gave me one and kissed…She had tears on her cheeks… she does that a lot....very silly…I wiped them off…and curved a wide smile on her lips…with my fingers…

There isn’t a day that I haven’t thanked the guy who dropped me into this world…the long rides with wind grazing my hair…the crisp summer air…smell of a rose…chattering rain…maa’s kiss…Joe’s pat…Dan’s sniff…children..the sunsets…Beethoven…cello…..

Man this is a beautiful world…..

Oh, I almost forgot to tell one more thing about me…I’m blind, I help in the blind school in my town…And girls, I’m not SEEing anyone now….single ;)

Luv ya all…..